People be like…
Come to a performance, ask for a place to plug in my phone.
"The NFL’s preseason is a subject of little debate, because everyone agrees that it kind of sucks, is too long, and could probably be eliminated completely and no one would care. The games still draw enough ratings for the networks to broadcast a couple every August and make other sports cry at the ratings they’re able to amass with mere exhibitions.”
Mysteries of science.
I get science, let me just say. I always enjoyed it in school (well, except for seventh grade – that teacher was a … jerk).
But honestly, the basic science? Wow. Like, for example: skin. It’s amazing to me that our bones don’t just fall out of our bodies. I know it’s all about atoms and cells and magnetism and crap like that, but it’s all kind of incredible. Science = magic, right? Nah, it’s just science.
Even if it is kind of amazing.
Al: What does he mean by almost 18?
Adams: Seventeen normal size and a short one that’s hell with a knife.
How my grandmother nearly ruined my favorite nut.
It was tough, especially near the end, to tell with my grandmother – if she was doing bullshit stuff just to be a bitch (this was something she not infrequently did, btw), or if she was submitting to some form of Alzheimer’s or dementia or whatever. So, nuts and nuts.
My grandma had hearing aids. And she ate one. And she said, “I thought it was a cashew.” She was 90 at the time.
All I can say is that, when I heard, I laughed. It was just so typically Ruth. Just one more thing she could do to stick it to us. Something else to make our lives hell. But still funny, like the time she threw the Star-lite mint wrapper out the window of the car. (“I thought you told me to!”)
Even thinking about getting a tattoo makes me think, “Why did I get that tattoo?!” It also makes me think about what my arm is going to look like when it’s 80.